Hey Queens 👋🏾 Dee here
It’s #worldmentalhealthday#worldmentalhealthday and I just want to encourage you to speak up! You are never alone. I personally deal with anxiety, a lot more than id like to admit. I constantly remind myself, you can be “STRONG” and “INDEPENDENT” and still need support and cry every now and again too. I cry more than a little and I love blaming it on being a sensitive ass Pisces and telling myself I need to grow the fuck up because grown ups don't cry. But truth is, it’s because I bottle a lot inside! I was raised being told to leave it in God’s hands when in reality I needed to let it out and leave it all out on the table. The thought of this still gives me anxiety. There are levels to transparency and in this newfound digital age we live in, it's so hard to not apply a filter. That alone can cause major mental health issues that many don't even realize.
The navy made me anxious, I had and still have really bad insomnia (forget #TeamNoSleep) and I dealt with depression and was in denial. When I went to talk to the therapist it was because I didn't want to be at work when the truth is, I really needed to be there. She told me I had anxiety, which I would claim to get out of getting in trouble at work but like the say, your words are powerful. I thought when I separated from the military it would get rid of all my issues, but truth is it added to.
I moved hundreds of miles away from home, alone to seek peace because I hate being alone! That in itself is a problem I never wanted to deal with. Still to this day people ask me, how did you do that. Did you and your boyfriend break up. No we didn't but I needed to get to the bottom of me. Attack your issues first hand! Today I still suffer. More than a little. More than I'd like to share. But I'm managing. I go to the movies once or twice a week. I take baths and sit in silence. I'm reading more, meditating more and communicating what I feel more. It's a journey, but its one worth taking. Even though I'm in a new town, seeking self I still realize that even in solitude you need others. I wasn't put on earth by myself. There are trillions of human beings on the earth and that fact alone should tell you that you can't do it all by yourself. I'm still working on that.
As black women we suffer more than a lot of our counterparts (not including black men) in part, that’s because we were raised thinking one of a few things, therapy is for white ppl, give it to god, toughen up, etc, and the list goes on! Mental health is just as real as physical health, and it deserves equally if not more care than your physical being.
Here’s a few words of encouragement:
1. You DO NOT have to suffer in silence.
2. You are not the only one, ME TOO!
3. You deserve just as much love as you give out
4. You’re allowed to cry, have feelings, sit still and feel weak at times
5. Pay attention to what you truly feel, denial is the real enemy
6. That’s what therapist are there for, reach out to someone!
7. You do need others, you were not put on earth alone to be alone. Find your tribe and love on them!
8. Their wins are not your losses
9. You are capable and you are worthy, get out of your head and get into your soul
10. Lastly, take care of yourself! You deserve to live your best life at peace, mentally!