Can you See Yourself?
Sis, I want you to take a second to think about the last time you looked in the mirror after a shower and loved who you saw looking back at you. If that was an easy one for you, I’ll assume that you have been loving the skin you’re in NATURALLY. If that is not the case then I want you to look in the mirror, without lashes or enhancements on and tell me if you still love who you see. You don’t have to really tell me but I really want you to ponder on that for a minute.
I’m noticing this major epidemic of false enhancements such as lace fronts and lashes. It seems Black women as a collective (not all but many) have let go of sew-ins and jumped straight to wearing a 'whole scalp'. Now do not get my words misconstrued,
"I am all for a slay but not at the expense of your own self-esteem Black woman".
I can say from experience that going long periods of time keeping up with lashes and weave takes a toll on your brain. I personally began to believe that the enhancements were actually a representation of me, then it went downhill from that point. I was only able to see myself through the enhancements which was blinding me from seeing who I truly was behind it all. Distracting me from falling in love and accepting myself naturally. This is why often times when you take your weave out you kind of cringe inside. The cringe may not always be because you think you don’t look pretty but you have programmed your brain to think that something needs to be fixed. This is a huge problem because you are now chipping away at your self-esteem with each new hairstyle.
"In most cases you are not buying a product but an identity- enhancer." - Patriana Jones
This is the reason I would like to propose a challenge to my sisters if you are up for it. I challenge you to switch it up often. When I say switch it up, I do not mean hair colors, weave textures, and different eyelash strip styles. I mean every few months you should do your best to check in with your natural self by not wearing enhancements. I understand that some women truly just love beauty and the feeling that changing up your look brings, but there has got to be a balance. You cannot go half a year with bundles and lashes and then decide to shock your system by rocking your natural hair that you probably only rock for a week to let your hair, “breathe”.
Take the mask off Black woman, look at yourself. Your natural lashes still pop with mascara. Your natural hair is magic. You do not need to contour the features God made perfect from the beginning. I need you to know this because I need our daughters to know this too. If they never see their mother, I mean SEE their mother, they will grow up to want to look like someone they are not. During slavery, they taught us to hate our appearance and to cover our kinks and coils. This trauma has been passed down to us going from generation to generation but it must stop with us.
We will teach our daughters that she can slay in a wig but she can slay even harder when she rocks her natural crown; that's what we bestow, a CROWN. Sis, we are so beautiful and I truly hope that you believe that in your heart. If you don’t, it’s time to say goodbye to the enhancements and begin your healing process. The Black woman hair complex is a real thing and we must pay attention to it now more than ever instead of attempting to make an excuse for our trauma. We were strategically stripped of our culture and we are doing so good at following the path that our ancestors paved for us. Let us not let them down by continuing to foster the idea that “white is better”.
Let’s just be honest, white America has somehow convinced us that long and straight is better with their 'cute little' commercials. But I am here to tell you that long and straight is not the standard. Your hair follicles are your antennas sis, that’s why your hair grows OUT and up. That’s why your hair gets bigger and bigger as you continue to take care of it. Your hair helps you to receive the messages that you need from the universe and if you’ve always got it covered, what messages are you receiving?
Are you up for the challenge?
Sound off below on how often you allow your hair to 'breathe'?
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